Addie received her "Welcome to Kindergarten" letter this week and my heart almost stopped as I stood at the end of my driveway reading it. How is my BABY GIRL starting Kindergarten in just two short weeks?
With tears filling my eyes, I flipped through the rest of the mail and saw Blake's "Welcome to Preschool" letter. My heart almost stopped again, but this time out of total and complete fear. My baby boy is SO not old enough to be going to preschool in three short weeks. Except he is...and this transition is not going to be easy for either of us.
People keep telling me that I will be surprised by how quickly Blake falls into the routine of Preschool and how much he will grow to love it in no time at all. I hang on those words and pray every single night that my fears are wrong. That his teacher won't have to pry his little fingers off of my car door every morning. That I won't have to hear him crying for me as I drive away. I know this is going to happen in the beginning...there is no question in my mind. But I hope with all my heart that it doesn't last long and that sooner than I can imagine, he will love school as much as his sister does.
Blake's first day is sure to be emotional and so will Addie's, but in a very different way. She has become the most outgoing, friendly, sassy, lovable little girl and she is honestly counting down sleeps until she gets to start Kindergarten. It scares me how independent she's become and how fearless she is in social situations. She wears her heart on her sleeve and wants to be friends with EVERYONE she meets. I know she is going to love Kindergarten and love getting to go and learn every day. My only fear for her is that she will have her heart broken when she realizes that not every kid will want to be her best friend. I worry about the bullying and meanness that just doesn't exist in preschool. At least not in hers. I realize this is a part of life and it comes with growing up, but it still makes me sad to think about. I just pray she makes a great group of friends that she can be excited to see every day. I hope she finds her Dana. After all, Kindergarten is when we first met and now look...we are raising our babies together as SISTERS!!
I could sit all night crying in my cocoa, thinking about all the sad and scary parts about sending my babies off to school, but there really is SO MUCH to look forward to!! The kids are desperate to get back to a routine and so am I. I miss being in the classroom and I know Addie does too. Blake has no idea what's coming for him, but he needs this routine. Once we get past the really hard stuff in the beginning, I think Preschool is going to be a great thing for him. He is SO smart and SO funny...he just needs to get through this transition.
And speaking of transitions...this will be the FIRST TIME in almost 6 years that I will have two mornings a week to myself. ALL. TO. MYSELF. I know those 2 hours and 15 minutes will go by in the blink of an eye, but the fact is...I finally have them. And I need that time as much as my kiddies need school. It is going to be glorious and I may go broke from buying Starbucks. Just sayin. But to be able to pack up my laptop and head to Barnes and Noble ALONE or go for a run ALONE or go to the grocery store ALONE is just...I mean...there aren't words. This probably all sounds terrible, the way I am rejoicing about being away from my kids, but I think all mothers understand how important it is for our sanity to have those moments alone. How much we need it to survive.
I have spent this summer doing everything I love. Camping, swimming, sleeping in, spending time with friends and family...it's truly been one of the best summers ever. Perhaps one of the best parts about this summer was getting to spend my Tuesdays with these 4 kiddos.
Some days were crazy and some days were surprisingly easy. But even on the hardest day, I would NEVER trade these moments for anything :-)
I feel like I've dedicated this summer to my family. I've done everything and anything for them and put aside some of the things I wanted to accomplish this summer to be there for them. To play with them, to swim with them, to read them stories, to take them camping, to take them to gymnastics and t-ball (even when he f&%$ing hated it), to teach them, to spoil them and to make it the best summer ever for them. We've made the most of every moment and I will look back on these memories for years and years to come.
But now I'm ready for some Jen time. I am excited to start teaching again. I am excited to be training for my next half marathon. I am excited to have two mornings a week to do whatever I need/want to do so that my nights can be free to spend with Eric and the kids. And most of all, I am excited for this next chapter of our lives and all the fun that comes with it. I hate to see my kids growing so fast but I am SO BLESSED to be the one raising them and experiencing every single moment. I am one lucky momma.
But now it's time really blow out these last two weeks of summer and cram in all the fun we can!! I hear we have a date to go see Planes this weekend and we haven't spent nearly enough time in Nana and Papa's pool. But in the middle of all this fun, momma needs to get ORGANIZED!! And these kids need to relearn how to GO TO BED before 9:00!! And so do I :-)
Nighty, nighty friends and here's to a WONDERFUL school year!!